i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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