i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So much Jack, so little girl.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
