I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
