32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
