You really coming over, don't trick.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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