Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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