Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
