They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
