Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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