would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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