me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
