its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
