No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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