I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize