I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
