i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize