why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize