i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
