i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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