11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
