let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
