it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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