It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
