Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize