After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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