I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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