Pappa wants mamma naked
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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