Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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