Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
