Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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