i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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