Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
