Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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