I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
