apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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