bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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