I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
