I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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