no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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