Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
