Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Randomize
