Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
