I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
