I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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