Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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