People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
