No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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