dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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