But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
