They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
