So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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