Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
